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Issue #11 • March, 2010
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VELFIN SPOIDIOYZ RIDES HIGH ON UNPRECEDENTED ECONOMIC PROSPERITY THANKS TO FINANCIAL WIZARDRY OF SHEMSHEEBO WOBBALUBDOK
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...The galaxy-wide surge in consumer spending and easy credit seems to have no end in sight. Millions of first-time room-owners and entrepreneurs are taking advantage of our good fortune, allowing the long-neglected underclass to imagine themselves as middle class. Manufacturers and distributors of ZUZZ! and other amusements are amassing enormous wealth.
...In the short period of time that Shemsheebo Wobbalubdok spent on the distant planet, Earth, he had managed to drain trillions of "dollars" from that planet's wealth and redirect it into the Velfin economy. The key to Wobbalubdok's triumph was his awareness that Earth's economy was based on loans that could never be repaid. So he pulled out the old Bazbadoran terrorist strategy -- "swap credit default" -- for destroying an enemy's economy so it cannot fund warfare. The earthforms found it an enticing financial product, and of course none of their species could comprehend. Before they figured out what had happened, Shemsheebo Wobbalubdoc was on his way back to the Velfin Spoidioyz with his plundered bounty. "They are a savage race," said Mlw. Wobbalubkok. "And they were ripe for picking. It was the only graceful thing I could do."
...He had traveled to Earth with Koko Dozo as a low level clerk in charge of supplies. In that role his primary duty was to ensure that Koko Dozo did not deplete the ship's supply of ZUZZ!. Mlw. Wobbalubdok has certainly gone far since then.
Shemsheebo Wobbalubdok --
financier and philanthropist
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IT'S HERE!

IT'S THIS!!

IT'S THAT!!!

IT'S NEW!!!!

FINALLY. . .
KOKO DOZO'S LATEST!!!!!!!!!
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THE BLESSED EXALTED MUMULO HABJABOR IS SO PLEASED WITH ECONOMY, HE INTENDS TO TICKLE EVERY MALE CITIZEN OF THE VELFIN SPOIDIOYZ
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....It is Shopping Day for the lucky male multitudes of our beloved Galaxy as we await our tickling by The Blessed Exalted Leader. Despite some public outcry about tickling offenses in His Glorious Past, we look forward to this event with great excitement and rippling gulbupples. In anticipation of this sacred event, many in our office have noted a tingling sensation in the norpse canal.
....In response to concerns that have surfaced about the nature of our Blessed Leader's "orientation," The Blessed Exalted Mumulo Habjabor has issued a clarification of his intentions: "What! Who...me? Hey... if you have any doubts about my "orientation" just ask my My Royal Spouse -- Queen Zemmn Chubshuckis. And while you are at it -- please ask the hundreds of thousands of mighty warriors with whom I shared cramped sweaty living quarters in the ZhiChiddek Flulem Corps. These virile heroes, having earned the highest honors in the Great Umgwoy Massacre would be mortified to be harassed with such foolish questions. So, in light of the fact that such unpatriotic hounding would cause dire distress to those who served the Velfin Spoidioyz with such legendary valor -- I demand, under penalty of death, that they be spared such an inquiry. Be that as it may -- certainly feel free to direct such vile inquiry to our beloved Queen Zemmn Chubshuckis. But unfortunately she is indisposed at this moment. She is upstairs crying her eyes out over the very thought of such infamy. In fact -- I have just changed my mind: I hereby decree that I shall not tickle anybody. Ever again. Happy now?"
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The Blessed Exalted
Mumulo Habjabor
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create your remix of SPACEMAN and compete with fellow earthforms
for these FABULOUS PRIZES:
 - self-esteem
- honor and/or glory
- your mix will be posted on this site and on Koko Dozo's mySpace page
- a free copy of FEEL THE ZUZZ!
- an endorsement deal with ZUZZ Intergalactic: you will be the
.. spokes-creature for an actual ZUZZ! ad
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INSTRUCTIONS
- listen to SPACEMAN (press the play button up there)
- DOWNLOAD the stems & lyrics
- take mind-altering substances (avoid prosecution by taking legal
..ones which are legally obtained)
- have fun with your toys
- email a URL so we can download your mix (info@kokodozo.com)
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RULES
- this is copyrighted material so... you know...
you can copyright the SR but fill in the authorship parts according
to the info in the lyrics doc that you’Äôve downloaded
- the title of your mix must be:
’Äú"Koko Dozo - Spaceman (your name Remix)"
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DEADLINE
- april 30, 2010
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..The Whole Earth Zhufmalog:
...This Wild And Wacky Omposm Called Earth
... by Farfummf Watafazmoo
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....Greetings my beloved homzoi peepz and doggies.
....Last month it snowed a lot to the great relief of earthforms. The snow was proof that their dreaded Global Warming did not exist. Last week it rained so much that many earthforms required floating vessels to navigate the streets in order to avoid getting their socks wet; plus this week it is, I am told, unseasonably warm which is indisputable proof that Global Warming is upon them. This planet is so sensitive to the slightest possibility of moderate micro-incremental change that I fear Earth might be knocked out of its orbit if I should burp in my sleep. Sometimes I long for the relative stability of Bazbador where gakkling about the weather is a rather banal enterprise and tyranny is a foregone conclusion.
....Yes, even the question of tyranny is resistent to definition. I was assured that Hussein Obama is a cruel despot. But then I changed the channel on their gakklebox only to discover that he actually believes in voting! Also in employing the manly art of exchanging pleasantries as a means of persuasion. The only thing that seems to be consistent is that earthforms are mad as hell and are not going to do anything about it.
....Everybody wants to be a vampire here on Earth. My readers in the Velfin Spoidioyz will be facinated to learn that Earth also has those barl-vumping rodents known as vampires. Oddly, the vampires on Earth are cute earthform-like puppies which are considered to be quite adorable. Apparently these vampires cuddle with the young earthform females, unlike our own vile creatures which deposit their droppings all over our clean floors and leave our gugglioz full of itchy sores. Imagine getting all cuddly with one of our vampires!
....These earthforms are certainly incomprehensible but they are suckers for Koko Dozo's sonic emissions. Comprehend, Flomprehend.
Bazbadorian Vampire Earth Vampire
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.See the review of our first album ILLEGAL SPACE ALIENS
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 read it
NOW!!!
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